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U-12 Girls' Soccer News

The Beacon Hill Bobcats, coached by Ms. Mackiavellian, Coach F. and Baby E., faced the Tukwila Fire today in a what was perhaps their first equal match of the year. Although the Bobcats struggled at the beginning of the season, the team has shown significant improvement every week. Last week's game saw the Bobcats' first goal and a loss by only one point. This week, in a heartening turn of events, the Bobcats scored first in a breakaway shot by newcomer G. This brought a much-needed burst of energy and aggression to the Beacon Hill girls, who had gained a reputation for lacking both.

The Bobcats' goal was answered by two from the Fire before halftime, when the referee pulled both teams' coaches aside to warn them about trash-talking. Coach M. apologized profusely to the ref, but whispered to Coach F: "It's nice to see them getting so feisty." Indeed, the only goal of the second half was scored by timid, bespectacled A., moving out of the defensive position for the first time ever. "We found us a new forward," raved Coach F. after the game. Parents and players shrieked and bounced in jubilation.

Reaching across enemy lines, cute opposing Coach H. approached Coach M. after the game to trade e-mail addresses, offering the assistance of high-school volunteers in continuing the school-based program. "We diverse, south-end teams have to stick together," said Coach M. "Especially the cute blonde lesbianish coaches." Okay, she didn't say that, but maybe she should have.

With three games left in the season, the Bobcats are optimistic about improving on last year's record.

There's a girl I've known for three years now, since she was in the third grade. She was famous for being teary and whiny and fragile. I couldn't stand her because any little thing that happened, she'd collapse over. Buck up, girl. G wasn't even in my class, thank goodness, because I'd just have wanted to smack her every time she cried. But she was in my math group in fourth grade (tearfully), and I had her for science (tearfully) 'cause that's what I do. In fifth grade, she was sooo sad all the time. Maybe she was genuinely depressed (in which case, forgive me), or maybe she was just being adolescent and annoying.

Anyway. In March, Coach F and I started an after-school girls' soccer program. Convinced G to join, even though she was reluctant. And you know what? She kicks ass. She's fast and feisty and and coordinated, all. It doesn't bother her when other kids get in her face. She beats kids who've been playing for six years, let alone six months. She's even confident about going to middle school next week. I'll let you know when she makes the Olympics in 2013; in the meantime, I get to be her coach, as well as the other 11-year-olds'. Goal: equal or beat last year's record.

I got the game schedule today. Sunday afternoons from now into November, should anyone ever need an excuse to scream. And meeting all the other, buff coaches has almost inspired me to join a women's or co-ed adult team. I want to be buff, too! But let's be honest: I think I've got plenty going on. Saying no, saying no, saying no. Getting on Google and looking up teams. Yeah.